Monday, March 06, 2006

A little something for everybody...


Old professors never die. They just lose their faculties.

Pete: "How old is Professor Greene?"
Sarah: "Pretty old. They say he used to teach Shakespeare."

Old programmers never die...
... They just don't 'C' so good.
... They just branch to a new address.
... They just lose their memory.

Old lawyers never die. They just lose their briefs.

Old librarians never die. They just lose their points of reference.

The student raised his hand in class: “May I be excused now?
My brain is full.”

The law student was unprepared that day for class. He was
called on by the most-feared professor in the school. Everybody
was afraid of Professor X because he would not accept a “Pass,”
from any student. The law student stood up to recite, as required
in Professor X’s class, reached into his back pocket and pulled out
his billfold. He flipped it open and held it up to his face. “Scotty,
beam me up.”

(credits: The first 3 jokes come from Bad Puns, a worthy website full of all kinds of fun wordplay: http://www.badpuns.com/ I just recalled or made up the lawyer and librarian jokes. The student with the full brain is actually the line from a Gary Larsen Far Side cartoon. The last story is a law school legend told me by my sister who attended University of Texas at Austin, where she swore it happened (she just couldn't say to whom). I always loved the story. It ranks way up there in my personal fantasies with riding a big Harley Davidson motorcycle down the stairs in any of the "pit" style classrooms during a particularly boring class. A really impressive horse is another nice alternative to the motorcycle, but less noisy, which I guess is part of the whole point!

The decoration above is from http://www.cookiesbythecrate.com/cookies/brightenyourday.jpg
Cookies, can you imagine?

The Buddha said we make our world with our mind. That seems pretty good. Laughing more seems like a good plan right now. Kind laughter, though.

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